Oh, my kittens, we have a problem on our hands. I know that I do not usually...
Project Rungay is one of those heartening examples of blogs that just sort of started out, making their way into the world with only a song in their hearts and change of clothing in their cardboard suitcases, and were discovered and promoted on the basis of sheer merit. And, once famous, they did not slack off or decide to be part of the Gawker empire; they kept doing what they did best.
Tom and Lorenzo describe themselves as gay (duh), married for 12 years, more or less homebound and total fans of "Project Runway," the hit series in which designers compete with each other for a chance to be sort of rich and maybe famous.
When I say "fans," I do not mean "uncritical lovers of the program," I mean snarky commentators who care enough to separate the wheat from the chaff and to quarrel with the producers, stars, designers and judges - all while being pretty darned funny. They can be found at projectrungay.blogspot.com, and they post frequently and almost immediately after the airing of each show.
You may not be aware, probably having important financial decisions to make every day as the fate of the free world lies in your hands, that "Project Runway" has been going through some changes lately. The program had been running on Bravo, but there was some extremely boring and contentious disagreement between Bravo and the Weinstein Co., which wanted to move the program to Lifetime, the channel of women-in-peril movies, and hire a new production company to run it.
Well, litigation, countercharges, blah blah, but in the end "Project Runway" ended up on Lifetime, where it is the same, but different. Tim Gunn, America's most unlikely TV star - some company is holding a contest where first prize is a lunch with him - is still there, still funny, still trying to be useful - and Heidi Klum is still there being Heidi Klum, which certainly has its advantages.
The contestant pool has not yet yielded a television natural, like Jay McCarroll or Santino Rice; the designers with personality seem to be mostly nasty rather than snarky (such a big difference) - and there are certainly no amazing designers, like Christian Siriano - but it is, to be fair, early days yet. But the show is a wee bit boring already, and when it's boring, it's just oddly dressed people wielding scissors, which has limited entertainment value.
Tom and Lorenzo have put their attractive fingers on the problem, of course. In former seasons, the judging panel was as fixed as the Hindu pantheon of gods. There was Michael Kors (Project Rungay calls him the Duchess); Nina Garcia, a sensible fashion editor; and some guest judge with relevance to that week's program. Now, all of a sudden, Michael and Nina have departed with no explanation and instead we have, well, who knows? "An Oscar-nominated costume designer" - couldn't they get a winner at least? - or "a well-known fashion commentator" - judging from the blank looks on the contestants' faces, it's not clear how well known he is.
And these people, however well credentialed they may actually be, seem to be unable to talk interestingly about fashion. They seem sometimes not even to be aware of the parameters of the challenge. It's as if we're watching judge auditions at the same time as we're watching contestant eliminations.
And why were we having all the guest judges? Because the show is in Los Angeles. Nothing against my hometown, but if you're gonna have a fashion design show, you've got to have it in New York. Of course they design clothes in L.A. too; they design clothes in San Francisco, for that matter, and no one thinks we're the fashion capital of the world. According to Tom and Lorenzo, the show was moved to L.A. so Klum could be close to her family (her husband is the singer Seal), which is all very admirable, but it's a continent away from the action.
It's a continent away from Kors and Garcia, who have real jobs, which is why we're not seeing them. It's also, by the way, a continent away from the place where people talk really well. If you want repartee, you want New York. If you want fashion repartee, you really want New York.
So, I'm still watching it. Hell, I watched "Lost" during the so-called Period of Plot Famine, so I can hang on a bit longer. And I never ever thought I'd say this, but: I miss Michael Kors.
In which we talk seriously about a trivial matter, although of course fashion itself is extremely serious.
Like Miles Davis, I've been swayed by the cool. There's just something about the summertime. There's just something about the moon. So I'll lay a kiss on a stone, toss it upside your window by the roof. Before you change your mind, Miles, bring in jcarroll@sfchronicle.com.
This article appeared on page E - 12 of the San Francisco Chronicle
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